Axed

Oh readers I come to you with a heavy, and pissed heart. Two days ago my boss told me to leave my entire set of keys in my mailbox because her boyfriend had to do something with them. Um ok, weird, but ok. Then tonight I get an email saying this dog walking thing with me just wasn’t working out. Yeah. You read me right, I was fired from the most embarrassing job to begin with. The reasoning: STUPID MOTHERFUCKING BABYSITTER. My boss said I was late three times and she can’t rely on that inconsistency with her business (not word for word, I’m more articulate than she). My babysitter was obviously late more than three times, but the times I couldn’t compensate I had to tell my boss. Remember that blog where I was complaining about my babysitter’s irresponsible lateness? Yeah, that in turn was responsible for me being fired, un-fucking-believable. Also remember when I said I was embarrassed to tell people what I did for a job? Well now I’m even more embarrassed to say I was fired from said job.
So back to the drawing board, job search, job search and pray to Jebus something comes my way. I’m getting a little sick of the luck we’ve been having since moving to Kingston, so I think I’m owed a little something.
Mumma C

Spankin new

I’ve come to the realization that I’m embarrassed to tell people what I do when asked. I should have realized after going to a 90 year olds birthday party with complete strangers and being asked. In this particular situation I simply said I was between jobs, to which someone replied, “Oh that’s fun, keep things fresh and new”. Uh, yea, that’s it, I’m keepin it real, a 27 year old who still doesn’t have her shit together. The shitty thing is that it’s not as if I’m sitting around watching Judge Judy hoping a job will fall into my lap (actually I do watch Judge Judy). As times have changed and you don’t pound the pavement like our parents did, we simply forward our résumé to a company and hope our email address is stupid enough to grab their attention.
While being in Kingston I’ve only had two interviews, and as you all know, did not pan out. So I’ve decided to add a little spunk to my emails to grab HRs attention. I was thinking something like, “hey did you know the bodybreakers Joanne and Hal are on the Canadian Amazing Race, neato” or “I can bench press a grown man, and yes I realize this does not relate to this job in the slightest, just thought you should know”. I only will do this for jobs that I’m way under qualified for or ones I don’t care either way if I get called. I figure it can’t hurt to throw a little of my crazy in there, at this point I have nothing to lose.
Also shout out to my New Zealand readers, safe trip home and thanks for reading!
Mumma C

Paper boy & whiners

As I am working now and Tim is out of town my mom has been kind enough to come down for the week to look after sirs while I’m at work. We have made a discovery about baby sirs, which I think I suspected all along. This blog covers parenthood and the crappiness of it, and how sirs is a bit of a whiner… hence why I’m whining online. When I’m not at home apparently Cobain is the most well behaved, quietest, sweetest baby that ever lived. Um, which baby are you looking after all day, because I know my sirs is 1 of the 3 above mentioned. He’ll be playing perfectly content and the second I walk in the door he’s crying and rolling all over the floor, and cuddling his toys. It’s not as if I ignore him when I walk in the door, I drop everything and go right to him and give him hugs and kisses. What.the.fuck. Is it me? Is he suckie with me because he knows he can get away with it? Did he miss me? I’d like to say it’s because he missed me, but even after he gets used to me being around he’s still carrying on being a little bugger and whining. Why can’t we all just get along and not cry when we’re around each other? I’m hoping it’s just something he’ll get over, but good news for babysitters that he’s not as terrible, “allegedly”, as I make him seem.

As part of my super elitist job the odd time I have to deliver our business flyers to certain neighborhoods. Gah. First of all, NO ONE LIKES FLYERS, secondly, it’s awkward as all hell going up to someone’s house when they’re clearly home and trying to run away before they catch you. I had to explain myself to one half dressed man today who opened his door as I was waiting to not get sprayed by his sprinkler; otherwise I would have escaped in time, damn it. Half of what I said was unheard so I had to keep repeating myself, then as I was walking away he told me to take my flyer back. Rejected, and insanely embarrassing. I have to go back to that neighborhood tomorrow as I didn’t have enough flyers. I’m thinking of wearing a mask so people that I pissed off today with my stupid flyers don’t recognize me tomorrow.

The endless joke that is my life continues on…
Mumma C